Saturday, February 2, 2013

Too Slutty for Caché

I never go into Caché, but at the mall the other day, a dress in the window caught my eye.  I thought I would go in and try it on.  I looked for my size but they were fresh out of midget sizes.

“I think the dress on the mannequin might be your size.  Want me to get it for you?” said the saleslady.

I almost said no.  Her having to strip a mannequin would leave me too far in her debt.  I can’t say I’ve ever stripped a mannequin, but it seems hard.   What if I tried it on and didn’t like it and she was all like “but I stripped a mannequin for you!” and I would be all like “I’m sorry.  Yes, of course I’ll buy this dress.”  Then I would have this ugly ill-fitting dress in my closet that I never wore but would feel bad throwing out because it’s a brand-new dress that I paid good money for.   Then I would feel bad and wear it anyway and my friends would ask me why I’m wearing a dress that doesn’t even fit and I would say “because someone stripped a mannequin for me” and they would forever think of me as some pervert who has a thing for naked mannequins and I just couldn’t handle that kind of humiliation!  Whew.  Now…where was I…

Oh yeah…I went ahead and said yes and tried it on. I guess mannequins only come in my size at Baby Gap because the dress was too long.

“How’s it working for you?” asked the saleslady.
I came out of the dressing room.  “It’s too long.  I’d like it better if it was about here”, I said pulling the dress up a little past my knees.
“Yeah, our clients typically like a longer length.  They generally like to have their knees covered.”

Basically, she politely told me I dress like a hooker compared to their average customer.  So you could look at this one of two ways. One-I’m too slutty for Caché.  But I like to look at it this way. I’ve still got it and I’m too slutty for Caché.

The models show more skin than the average Caché customer.

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