Wednesday, July 24, 2013

We Should Have Mystery Marks

My kids are so much cooler than me.  Seriously, they have awesome ideas.  Like why doesn’t the English language include a mystery mark?

“What’s this?” asked Hudson pointing to a question mark in one of his books.
“It’s a question mark.”
“What’s a mystery mark?”
“Not a mystery mark.  Question mark.”
“I know, but what’s a mystery mark?”
“We don’t have a mystery mark?”
“Why?”

And that’s a good question.  Why don’t we have a mystery mark?  It’s a valid question.  We really should have some way of differentiating the deeper questions of life from just regular old questions. Like, what is our purpose in life? (mystery mark) What is the true meaning of happiness? (mystery mark)  Why does my dog make loud sounds when he farts when he doesn’t have butt cheeks? (mystery mark)

If I ever became a super hero, I would wear a mystery mark on my costume.  I know what you’re thinking and no, it’s totally different from the Riddler.  The Riddler wears question marks, which I have just established is less cool than a mystery mark and not nearly as…you know…mysterious.  Plus, the Riddler is evil whereas I would use my powers for good.  I would start with doing something about people that ask questions on Facebook that beg for an ego stroke like, “Why doesn’t anyone love me?” or "Why does my life suck so bad?" Cause why do people have to be needy like that? (mystery mark).

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2 comments:

  1. You do have seriously great kids. He'd be blown away by the artist formerly known as Prince, huh?

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  2. Oh, how existential of Hudson. Has he been sneaking out of bed late at night to watch Room With a View?

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